The kids here are ESL students, but they’re also kids, and the combination of those traits makes them say the funniest things. We’re always sharing little gems with each other, but this one was so wonderful that we had to post it here. I feel a little naughty, given my profound respect for copyright law, for sharing this without asking my student’s permission, but I think the future him would approve.
Below is a writing prompt I posed to my online class, and below that is the essay I received from one of the students–a chatty little bruiser whose philosophical musings dominate every class I teach him in. He’s figured out that if he says something interesting, I’ll let him talk, despite the loud sighing noises from the rest of the room. This is why I’m a bad teacher. That’s okay. I’m so proud of him for not being a robot. I think he’ll make great art in a decade or so.
Here’s the prompt…
TOPIC: Imagine you won a big prize: For the rest of your life, you will receive 10 million won a month. The only requirement is that you attend the university of your choice and study whatever subject you wish. You won’t ever need a job, so you can study ANYTHING. What would it be? Describe this subject, your interest in it, and what you would gain from the experience. If you can’t think of a subject to study, visit university websites until you find something that interests you.
And here’s my student’s essay…
If I win whe prize, I’ll study who things. first is human body cell, second literature. At first I want to write about the reason why I want to study humans body cell. Have ever wonder that humans life is so short and nothingness. When I was 12~13years old, I always wonderd why I felt like that. But finally I found out all humans life are the same and short. Although they will have different experience and have a different grades on their studies. Their purpose are always the same. Think about what we usually think as one person’s life stages? First we born. second we go to school, make friends and study. Third we choose what to do for our income or get married. Fourth we raises child. Fifth retire and rest. Sixth die. Although it seem like it has many part It is not enough for the person to do what they want. we can’t play or do a lots of things that peson want. If I say like that people will say. “we could play and do what we want after retire”. But do you think iit will be fun or exciting when we play at 60~70? No never. So I will study human body cell and going to make artificial cell. This will make us young when we retire and made money that we could live until the cells powers over.
After studying about that. I will study literature. I always had interest in literature. It is beautiful and woderful to write about something. Topic is not so important. You know by reading many colums and stories, people can have desire to write about it. Agreement, disagreement. one’s personal opinion.
Fore these reaosn. If I can study about anythings rest of my life i’ll choose human’s body cell and literature
It’s Heather again (although I hope I don’t have to clarify that!). Charming, isn’t he? But can you imagine editing that and explaining all the errors? The online class is NOT my favorite!!
A while ago my mom asked me to write something about the students I teach. “What are their days like?” she wondered.
I forgot about this request for a few months, but I remembered it just this morning. So here goes:
From what I can tell, most of my students are between 13 and 15 years old. The fact that I’m not sure might sound a little odd, but it’s actually hard to figure out. If you ask them how old they are they usually give their Korean age which is based on the lunar calender. This means that everyone born between certain dates is the same age. A tiny “12″ year old is the same age as one that has really started growing and is 8 inches taller.
Whatever their Western age is, this time of life is difficult for anyone. Jenny, one of the brightest girls in Heather’s class recently explained why her response seemed incoherent: “I have puberty!” The strange effects of Jenny’s disease are compounded by a strange (to me) disciplinary tendency in Korean child-rearing culture. Young children (in elementary school) are basically allowed to run wild. Mothers and teachers indulge and spoil them. Almost every childhood whim is gratified. They play in the streets with no supervision. In classes, the goal is “entertainment learning”, and punishment is distributed by pretty female teachers with a knowing grin. Kids will be kids, you know!
This all changes as soon as they set foot in a middle school. Suddenly, they are dressed in tidy, dark uniforms. Their flowing childhood tresses fall to the barbershop floor and they enter the classroom with a close-shorn skull. The girls almost all have the same haircut: evenly trimmed bangs skirting the eyebrows and falling no lower than the shoulders in back. Discipline changes entirely; no longer are they coddled. The tiniest infractions are punished with swift and merciless beatings with (what appear to be) pool cues. There’s been a lot in the Korean press recently about the abuses of middle and high school teachers; awful photos of cowering children, bruises covering half of their bodies have even been shown in the newspaper. One of my best students showed me the bruise she’d gotten earlier that day. On the back of her upper leg was a booksized, scarlet whelt! She smiled and said she got it for fighting with a boy. Her mother, justifiably, had been horrified and called the school to complain, but nothing was done. The outcry of parents has yet to make an impact on an educational culture whose disciplinary philosophy proclaims “the teacher who beats me hardest cares about me most.”
It is generally agreed upon by almost everyone here that Korean public schooling is poor. National income tax is only about 3 percent and education is bare bones. It covers the typical subjects, but classes are large and, according to my more reliable student sources, teachers simply lecture and rarely ask questions or gauge student responses to see if the class is learning. The style is usually very authoritarian. Classes are held about 7 hours a day, 5 days a week and every other Saturday. Middle schools do not usually have clubs or afterschool activities. In high school they have soccer for boys, but nothing else and nothing for girls. Because of the spendthrift approach to public schooling, parents resort to private academies to supplement their children’s education. The money they would pay in taxes to build a better school system is instead given to private businessmen who often have little or no educational background, and view weak public schools as a huge financial opportunity.
There are academies for everything: English, Japanese, Chinese, Korean, math, computer programming, music, art, physical education, science, and study hall. Public schools have oversight, have a determined curriculum with ongoing review. Private academies have none of this, so the integrity of the material is completely dependent on the knowledge of the individual teachers. Several of the Korean teachers at our academy do not speak English at all. They teach grammar to the children in Korean, but the students speak English much more confidently. One other problem of a poor national school system is obvious. Only wealthier parents can afford the best academies. Poor students are stuck with the crumbs offered by the state and so, as they pass through high school into college and then into the workforce, find themselves at a distinct disadvantage throughout. Such are the benefits of privatizing your educational system.
And so, to the best of my knowledge, the average schoolday is something like this. Wake up at 7 am (you sleep on the floor). Eat kimchi and rice. Snooze or do homework for another 15 minutes until your brother wakes up (he goes to school later). Walk to school. School starts at 8. Classes last for around 40 minutes each. There is no lunch break–you eat kimchi and rice brought to you at your desk while you study. Get out of school around 2 pm. Now you raise hell for about an hour. You can go to the PC Room and play StarCraft or eat ice cream and junk food. Around 3, you probably go to your first academy which lasts till 6. Most students have at least two academies, but some have as many as five. Your academies last until 10 or 11 pm. Did you miss dinner? Usually you just snack on a little pork kabob on your way to class. Now it’s time to go home and make a choice. Should I do my academy homework or my school homework? Often you have to triage. The academy teachers are likely to be more brutal with their punishment (because they have no other way to motivate students who have long since realized that academy scores do not count on their student record). Hopefully you can do both quickly and get to bed by 1 am. Most students (and families) go to sleep around this time. Sleep is for the weak and lazy.
There are some students who take it easier, but since our school is a more prestigious academy, most of the students are on the high-intensity, college prep schedule. Competition is the driving force in their lives. It does not matter what they learn as long as they score well on the exam. To be number one in the school is the highest goal. “Try to be more creative with your word choice,” I say, “you always use the same words for different answers.” “Will you give me a higher score?” she responds.
